Meeting and Greeting
Bowing: Bow politely when you meet someone, thank them, or say goodbye. The depth, duration and number of bows is something non-Japanese aren’t expected to understand and visitors are unlikely to offend if they don’t do this perfectly. If a Japanese person bows to you, an incline of the head in return will usually suffice. Japanese do sometimes also shake hands, but it’s best to wait for the opposite party to offer their hand before thrusting yours forth.
Gifts: Returning from a trip, the change of seasons, and moving into a new home are among the many reasons gifts might be exchanged in Japan. For visitors, it’s a great idea to bring small gifts from your home country, especially if you’ll be staying with locals, or in case you need to say ‘thank you’ to someone during your trip. The simple gesture of sharing something from your home will be greatly appreciated – think souvenir key rings, chocolate bars, and other treats only available in your country. Avoid expensive or flamboyant offerings.
Two hands: The exchanging of business or name cards is still an important part of more formal introductions in Japan. You should use two hands when giving and receiving cards. This also goes for giving and receiving gifts.
Footwear rules
Shoes off: If a building has a sunken-foyer entrance (called a genkan), and there are rows or shelves of footwear by the door, it’s a clear sign you’re expected to remove your shoes. You’ll always have to remove footwear when entering a private home, traditional accommodation (minshuku or ryokan), and temple halls. Some restaurants with tatami (woven straw matting) areas will also require visitors to take off their shoes, as will some hostels and historic sites. Wherever you’re required to remove footwear, this is non-negotiable. (If you’re uncomfortable with the current state of your socks, consider getting yourself a new supply before your trip.)
Slippers off: When you take off your shoes, you’ll usually be given the option of a pair of slippers for walking around inside. These are fine on wooden and other flooring, but you should never wear slippers in a tatami room: remove them before stepping on tatami and place them at the room entrance.
Eating and drinking
Chopsticks: There are a number of dos and don’ts related to the use of chopsticks. The main ones to keep in mind are to not leave chopsticks standing upright in a bowl of rice, or use them to pass food directly to another person’s chopsticks. These actions are reminiscent of rituals associated with funerals and the dead. Also avoid anything that might be considered ‘playing’ with your chopsticks (this includes using them as a spear, drumming on the table, waving them to get the waiter’s attention, and using them to get at that itch on your back).
Slurping: When eating noodles in Japan, it’s standard practice to slurp them. Eat in any noodle restaurant and you’ll be surrounded by fellow diners noisily and unabashedly slurping away.
Tipping: There is no custom of tipping in Japan! Leaving a little extra cash on the table at a restaurant will often result in a waiter chasing you down the street to give it back.
Public behaviour
Quiet, please: It’s considered rude to speak on your mobile phone while on trains and buses, and announcements encourage travelers to switch phones to silent mode. People also tend not to speak loudly when travelling on public transport, so as not to disturb fellow passengers. If staying in an apartment or hotel, please use headphones to listen to music or television after 8pm, and speak quietly on the phone or when talking to companions after that hour.
Queuing: At busy times when waiting to board a train, Japanese form an orderly queue. Train station platforms will have markings showing where the carriage doors will pull up, and may have lines drawn on the platform to guide the direction of the queues.
Sniffles: It’s considered uncouth to blow your nose in public. You may also see people walking around wearing surgical-style masks – some choose to use these when they have cold or flu to help prevent passing on their ailment to others. Others may be wearing them to avoid passing on germs to their household if it is flu season or there is a cold going around – especially if they live with young children, an elderly relative, or someone with a compromised immune system. Be polite to your hosts in Tokyo and wear a surgical mask if you have a cold or allergies that cause sneezing. These are available at almost any pharmacy.
Public displays of affection (PDAs): While there are no laws against kissing, hand holding, or long embraces in Japan, in general these behaviors are frowned upon in public. You may find locals doing this, but they tend to be teenagers out on the weekend. If you want to put your best face forward and come across as more adult, in addition to avoiding long stares and awkward silences, save PDAs for private.
Language matters
Don’t assume: It’s not uncommon to meet Japanese who are keen to practice their English skills, but English is not as widely understood as some visitors expect and many people will be uncomfortable or too shy to use it. It’s best not to approach people with the assumption they will be able to speak it.
Some Basic Phrases: A few basic words and phrases in Japanese will go a long way, and locals will be disproportionately impressed by even your most tortured attempt at speaking their language.
Su-mi-ma-sen (‘excuse me’, which can also be used for ‘sorry’)
a-ri-ga-tō (‘thank you’)
ei-go ga ha-na-se-mas ka (‘do you speak English?’)
wa-ka-ri-ma-sen (‘I don’t understand’)
Bowing: Bow politely when you meet someone, thank them, or say goodbye. The depth, duration and number of bows is something non-Japanese aren’t expected to understand and visitors are unlikely to offend if they don’t do this perfectly. If a Japanese person bows to you, an incline of the head in return will usually suffice. Japanese do sometimes also shake hands, but it’s best to wait for the opposite party to offer their hand before thrusting yours forth.
Gifts: Returning from a trip, the change of seasons, and moving into a new home are among the many reasons gifts might be exchanged in Japan. For visitors, it’s a great idea to bring small gifts from your home country, especially if you’ll be staying with locals, or in case you need to say ‘thank you’ to someone during your trip. The simple gesture of sharing something from your home will be greatly appreciated – think souvenir key rings, chocolate bars, and other treats only available in your country. Avoid expensive or flamboyant offerings.
Two hands: The exchanging of business or name cards is still an important part of more formal introductions in Japan. You should use two hands when giving and receiving cards. This also goes for giving and receiving gifts.
Footwear rules
Shoes off: If a building has a sunken-foyer entrance (called a genkan), and there are rows or shelves of footwear by the door, it’s a clear sign you’re expected to remove your shoes. You’ll always have to remove footwear when entering a private home, traditional accommodation (minshuku or ryokan), and temple halls. Some restaurants with tatami (woven straw matting) areas will also require visitors to take off their shoes, as will some hostels and historic sites. Wherever you’re required to remove footwear, this is non-negotiable. (If you’re uncomfortable with the current state of your socks, consider getting yourself a new supply before your trip.)
Slippers off: When you take off your shoes, you’ll usually be given the option of a pair of slippers for walking around inside. These are fine on wooden and other flooring, but you should never wear slippers in a tatami room: remove them before stepping on tatami and place them at the room entrance.
Eating and drinking
Chopsticks: There are a number of dos and don’ts related to the use of chopsticks. The main ones to keep in mind are to not leave chopsticks standing upright in a bowl of rice, or use them to pass food directly to another person’s chopsticks. These actions are reminiscent of rituals associated with funerals and the dead. Also avoid anything that might be considered ‘playing’ with your chopsticks (this includes using them as a spear, drumming on the table, waving them to get the waiter’s attention, and using them to get at that itch on your back).
Slurping: When eating noodles in Japan, it’s standard practice to slurp them. Eat in any noodle restaurant and you’ll be surrounded by fellow diners noisily and unabashedly slurping away.
Tipping: There is no custom of tipping in Japan! Leaving a little extra cash on the table at a restaurant will often result in a waiter chasing you down the street to give it back.
Public behaviour
Quiet, please: It’s considered rude to speak on your mobile phone while on trains and buses, and announcements encourage travelers to switch phones to silent mode. People also tend not to speak loudly when travelling on public transport, so as not to disturb fellow passengers. If staying in an apartment or hotel, please use headphones to listen to music or television after 8pm, and speak quietly on the phone or when talking to companions after that hour.
Queuing: At busy times when waiting to board a train, Japanese form an orderly queue. Train station platforms will have markings showing where the carriage doors will pull up, and may have lines drawn on the platform to guide the direction of the queues.
Sniffles: It’s considered uncouth to blow your nose in public. You may also see people walking around wearing surgical-style masks – some choose to use these when they have cold or flu to help prevent passing on their ailment to others. Others may be wearing them to avoid passing on germs to their household if it is flu season or there is a cold going around – especially if they live with young children, an elderly relative, or someone with a compromised immune system. Be polite to your hosts in Tokyo and wear a surgical mask if you have a cold or allergies that cause sneezing. These are available at almost any pharmacy.
Public displays of affection (PDAs): While there are no laws against kissing, hand holding, or long embraces in Japan, in general these behaviors are frowned upon in public. You may find locals doing this, but they tend to be teenagers out on the weekend. If you want to put your best face forward and come across as more adult, in addition to avoiding long stares and awkward silences, save PDAs for private.
Language matters
Don’t assume: It’s not uncommon to meet Japanese who are keen to practice their English skills, but English is not as widely understood as some visitors expect and many people will be uncomfortable or too shy to use it. It’s best not to approach people with the assumption they will be able to speak it.
Some Basic Phrases: A few basic words and phrases in Japanese will go a long way, and locals will be disproportionately impressed by even your most tortured attempt at speaking their language.
Su-mi-ma-sen (‘excuse me’, which can also be used for ‘sorry’)
a-ri-ga-tō (‘thank you’)
ei-go ga ha-na-se-mas ka (‘do you speak English?’)
wa-ka-ri-ma-sen (‘I don’t understand’)